Tag Archives: California

Jive-Ass Rappel Station

Jive-Ass Rappel Station with stopper knot affixing rope to a bolt

Jive-Ass Rappel Station

Gosh, how the heck do you tie a bight of rope to a bolt hanger after you already tied it to the other bolt hanger with a funky ass knot? This is the question I envision the crafter of the Jive-Ass Rappel set up above having in the midst of crafting this F-ed up anchor.  Now granted, I don’t know if the, um…the…what would you even call that? ‘Stopper knot’? The thing on the left I mean. The bight of rope affixed to a bolt hanger with an overhand knot (the idea apparently being that the big fat knot will keep the rope from pulling back through the hole in the bolt hanger). Let’s go with stopper knot. Anyway, I don’t know if the decision to create the stopper knot was due to fixing the other end of the rope to the other bolt hanger first. That’s just my spectulation. Call it imaginary forensics if you like. I frankly have no idea why anyone would do this.

This Jive-Ass rappel set up (abseil set up for the Brits and Aussies among us) was submitted by Drew Smith, who happened upon it at Twin Craigs in the Lake Tahoe region of California. And since a lot of you have expressed concern that we all actually do something to remedy Jive-Ass situations rather than just take photographs of them, I want it noted for the record that, yes, Drew removed this shit so no one would get hurt in the future.

Now can we go back for a moment and evaluate this thing? The knot on the right hand bolt anchor: what the heck is that? I thought maybe a bowline at first, but now I’m not so sure. I can’t for the life of me figure out what that is.

And the anchor powerpoint. What the hell is that knot? I thought an overhand on a bight, but it looks like that quick link is attached to only one loop. Where’s the second loop?

And finally, can I say it again? Why the hell would you affix a rope to a bolt hanger with a stopper knot?  Scary.

Location: Twin Craigs, near Tahoe City, California, USA

Macramé Project Rock Climbing Anchor

Jive-Ass Rock Climbing Anchor or Elaborate Macrame Project?

Jive-Ass Rock Climbing Anchor or Elaborate Macrame Project?

Whoa! Check out this elaborate jive-ass rock climbing anchor from Joshua Tree! I was asked to post this anonymously, so as not to embarrass the macramé artist who created it. There’s a lot going on here, so for purposes of orientation, let’s assume the four sides of the photo correspond to the four cardinal points of a compass. What we seem to have here is a three point anchor created out of the blue cordage, created for a ‘westward’ direction of pull. All fine and well, I suppose, except that belay device (Trango Cynch? Gri-Gri?) is set up for a ‘southward’ pull. Yikes! What keeps that blue cord anchor from getting yanked 90 degrees from the angle of pull it was designed for if the seconding climber falls? Oh yeah, that sort of tan colored rope coming from the west and tied to the blue cord anchor’s power point will keep that from happening, right? But wait, what the heck is that tied to? Well that’s revealed in the larger photo below (wait for it! don’t look yet!).

Regardless, what we have are, apparently, two opposite and opposed anchors set up for a horizontal (east-west) load force. There’s the blue cord anchor set up for a westward pull, and whatever is on the other end of the tan rope, which is set up for an eastward pull. Nothing wrong with that, if you’re expecting a horizontal (east or west) load. Ah, but that’s not what we expect! In this case we see a belay is set up at the power point for a vertical load (climber is coming from the south). That’s jive-ass–especially for a belay station.

Not to fear though. It appears the belayer has tied into a separate anchor with the climbing rope. That anchor is attached to the same pro as the blue cord anchor with a long double runner fashioned into a sliding x with no limiter knots (which is jive-ass). If the blue cord anchor blows by pulling the gear out of the rock, that back up jive-ass sliding x also goes.

Now back to the question a paragraph or so up. What’s that tan colored climbing rope coming from the west tied to? It’s tied to this:

The Rest of the Elaborate Joshua Tree Jive-Ass Macrame Project Rock Climbing Anchor.

The Rest of the Elaborate Joshua Tree Jive-Ass Macrame Project Rock Climbing Anchor.

It appears there is a second macramé project rock climbing anchor on the other side! It’s hard to see exactly how it’s constructed, but whatever it is, it appears to come to a power point as a sliding x, set up for an eastward load force. And how is it connected to the tan rope? Well the tan rope is just clipped into the power point biner. It’s not tied to it in anyway, which makes you ask, what’s at the other end of that tan rope? I have no idea, but I certainly hope it’s not yet a third elaborate macramé project. How many cordalettes, slings, and locking carabiners does this climber carry?

Oh yeah, one more thing! The in EARNEST stands for “timely”. How long do you suppose it took to knit this beast together?

This elaborate monstrosity is one of the most impressive examples of jive-assery we’ve seen on this blog yet! Very, very impressive. I hope no one was hurt.

Location: Joshua Tree National Park, California, USA

American Death Triangle!

Ultra-Jive-Ass American Death Triangle

Ultra-Jive-Ass American Death Triangle

Whoa! This is so, so awesome! One rarely sees American Death Triangles anymore. This submission is from Ray Belt, who ran across this anchor at Joshua Tree. Given how Ultra-Jive-Ass it is, he naturally had to snap a photo. He won’t reveal who built this monstrosity  because, well, it’s just the right thing to do. We don’t want to embarrass people here. We just want to learn! Here is Ray’s description:

“It’s hard to tell but we actually have four pieces in this mess… the two hexes are set up “opposite and opposed” but clipped to the same biner that attaches to the bottom of the red “american triangle” webbing… all in all, this anchor would have done a fair job at it’s primary purpose (first piece to prevent a zipper) but wow! Not gonna tell you who put this one together… (!)”

Location: Joshua Tree National Park, California